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About Me Member Deviant of Many Talents Matt Sell25/Male/United States Recent Activity Deviant for 10 Months
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Funny AND Sad!

Tue Nov 24, 2009, 11:22 PM
Since I dont have much to yammer about. How about something funny and something sad for today.

""""""HOW TO INSTALL A HOME SECURITY SYSTEM

1. Go to a secondhand store and buy a pair of men's used size 14-16 work boots.
2. Place them on your front porch, along with a copy of Guns & Ammo Magazine.
3. Put a few giant dog dishes next to the boots and magazines.
4. Leave a note on your door that reads:

"Bubba,
Bertha, Duke, Slim, & I went for more ammo and beer. Be back in an hour.
Don't mess with the pit bulls; they attacked the mailman this morning and
messed him up bad. I don't think Killer took part, but it was hard to tell
from all the blood. Anyway, I locked all four of 'em in the house.

Better wait outside. Be right back.

Cooter""""""

FING A MAN!!!! Oh, and its the second day of hunting season for West Virginia. Got get dem deer, now wheres my gun woman!

Now this is just SAAAAAAAADDDD.

"""""""Love him or hate him , he sure hits the nail on the head with this!

Bill Gates recently gave a speech at a High School about 11 things they did not and will not learn in school. He talks about how feel-good, politically correct teachings created a generation of kids with no concept of reality and how this concept set them up for failure in the real world.

Rule 1 : Life is not fair - get used to it!
Rule 2 : The world doesn't care about your self-esteem. The world will expect you to accomplish something BEFORE you feel good about yourself.
Rule 3 : You will NOT make $60,000 a year right out of high school. You won't be a vice-president with a car phone until you earn both.
Rule 4 : If you think your teacher is tough, wait till you get a boss
Rule 5 : Flipping burgers is not beneath your dignity. Your Grandparents had a different word for burger flipping: they called it opportunity.
Rule 6 : If you mess up, it's not your parents' fault, so don't whine about your mistakes, learn from them.
Rule 7 : Before you were born, your parents weren't as boring as they are now. They got that way from paying your bills, cleaning your clothes and listening to you talk about how cool you thought you were. So before you save the rain forest from the parasites of your parent's generation, try delousing the closet in your own room.
Rule 8 : Your school may have done away with winners and losers, but life HAS NOT. In some schools, they have abolished failing grades and they'll give you as MANY TIMES as you want to get the right answer. This doesn't bear the slightest resemblance to ANYTHING in real life.
Rule 9 : Life is not divided into semesters. You don't get summers off and very few employers are interested in helping you FIND YOURSELF. Do that on your own time.
Rule 10 : Television is NOT real life. In real life people actually have to leave the coffee shop and go to jobs.
Rule 11 : Be nice to nerds. Chances are you'll end up working for one.""""""

  • Mood: Satisfied
  • Listening to: Alice in Chains
  • Watching: The X-Files
  • Eating: Cookies
  • Drinking: water

Devious Info

  • Current Residence: Does it matter?
  • Interests: trains, dragons, wolves, industry, girls...duuuh
  • Favourite movie: Movies.... Crimson Tide, The Rock, All Die Hards, Dragonheart and Underworld
  • Favourite band or musician: How about a band and the album...The Kovenant - In times before the Light
  • Favourite genre of music: Anything from death metal to pop rock. All country sucks except for the man in black, Johnny Cash
  • Favourite poet or writer: Jack London, Chris Paolini
  • Favourite photographer: O Winston Link, JJ Young, Jay Potter, Dave Baer, Wade Massie, Rich Bork
  • Favourite style of art: pencil, pen and ink, photography
  • Operating System: POS Windows
  • MP3 player of choice: None
  • Favourite game: Train Dispatcher 3
  • Personal Quote: The world is however you see it as.
  • Tools of the Trade: Camera, pen, and pencil

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Comments


:iconmarkkarvon:
Thank you for the favorites.

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:iconmarkkarvon:
...and for the watch.

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Home of the Old 96er.

Fine Art by Mark Karvon [link]
Karvon Graphics [link]
YouTube [link]
:iconstelladraco:
thanks for the fave!

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:icondragonwolface:
No Problem

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:iconleundra:
Heya! Thanks so much for watching me ^^

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:icondragonwolface:
No problem, you have some good stuff!

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There is but one thing that seperates humans from animals...the grocery store.
:iconakeiron:
Thanks for faving!

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check out my gallery! [link]
:icondragonwolface:
You welcome.

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There is but one thing that seperates humans from animals...the grocery store.
:iconavatarraptor:
YO! What is up. I see that you are on. :D :iconhappyfentonplz:

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Dan Phantom is the Best!
:icondragonwolface:
Yah ya ya. The battery is about dead and its almost midnight so Im getting offa here.

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There is but one thing that seperates humans from animals...the grocery store.

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